goh_wz

Love WFP as always. This is such a cute series of shorts, makes me miss Hong Kong so much!!! The subway, the skyline, the ferry, the night markets, the language... how can a city be so beautiful omg

(I realised that very regrettably this LJ has nothing much on my travels to HK haha)

Although we were holed up in the hotel the whole duration of the challenge, it was a super fun and educational weekend. Yes, a line on my CV and a few hundred dollars extra would have helped, but I wasn't really there to win, but to have fun, learn and make friends. I do think I learnt a lot about public policy for one weekend: Two years of GSC has equipped me with a general understanding of many policy aspects, but learning from the policy officers and trainers themselves gave us an understanding that was sharper and more focused. It's really amazing how knowledgeable the organisers and mentors all are regarding all the details of S'pore's public policies. We had the most random questions arising that pertained to our case presentations, and they were able to answer just offhand, at like 1 am? (right: Mentor helping us with our questions) And they were super helpful too, staying up with us until 2+ to help us with our presentations.

Quick start to networking

Through this PPC, I also learnt about how well-oiled the PSC scholarship system actually is (albeit 2 years too late to affect how I weighed my options back then). Not only do the scholars get this opportunity to learn about public policy, the scholars basically already knew the mentors who were coaching us thanks to the pre-departure and midterm programmes. That's one helpful support network that PSC has set up for its scholars in preparation for their career. I'm also glad that they decided to open up this programme to non-scholars, in part to attract more people to the civil service. (left: Conference timings with our mentor Jeffrey)

Our home, our policies

Although most people joined with their friends from college, people were generally open and friendly whenever they weren't working on their cases (of course when work still needs to be done it needs to be done). The mentors were helpful in getting us to know each other. But unfortunately I still preferred the comfort zone of my group even when we were supposed to be mingling around (must remember not to do that this Sat), so I didn't really get to know anyone outside my group other than my roommate Shuo Yan who btw was super nice! I wished I mingled around more often, especially since as S'porean students in the US we were guaranteed to have something to talk about. :( My college schoolmates are expert at going around every table during mass dinners to introduce themselves and talk haha.

But still, even if you don't go mingle around - as some people were saying in one of the small-group workshop discussions, "In the US, you need to speak in a certain way for people to understand you, but now I can speak in whatever way I want." "Yesterday, it was like I stepped into another world." It was really comfortable speaking in, or even just hearing Singlish in the S'porean accent, and to be chatting about life in the Singaporean context (too-expensive HDB flats, chasing degrees, getting married). Of course, we were also dealing with S'pore issues in our cases the whole time. And we were munching on 旺旺 and Yeo's chrysanthemum tea/lychee which PSC provided in their food pack (right) haha. That was really nice. Being overseas for so long, it doesn't take much S'porean food to please me heh.

I have never been too enthusiastic in being the person planning policies at the top, because I feel like I'm too far out from the ground to know the ground, and have far too little authority to make a difference. If I enter the civil service, I'd prefer to be a teacher all my life and concretely make a difference in my students' lives. But being away from home for so long and being momentarily transported back over the weekend—but from a bird's-eye perspective—really help clarifies the potential that we have in changing things. Back at home, we were always stuck under the frustrating effects of policy—crowded trains, costly flats, classes under tuition teachers—so we're forced to care about it, and live with it (thinking about it too much might make daily life more unbearable). But being away, the realisation is that we still do care—about MRT breakdowns, Sun Xu, Hougang's as yet inexistent by-election—and perhaps because we are thinking about it abstractly, to see the potential for us to make the change. And of course it helps a lot to come to PPC to practice policy-making and network with people who do it on a daily basis.

Two intense days at Westin

I reached Westin New York at Times Square at 4 pm on Friday, got introduced to two of my teammates Kylie and Jack, our mentor Jeffrey, and his assistant Yibing, and then checked in and had dinner. There was an introduction to public policy workshop by the case master, who's a trainer at the Civil Service College, followed by supper which was chocolate fondue, where, by keeping to my group at some corner, I foolishly given up one of my last chances to properly socialise.

Because the case was released at 8 am the next morning, and everyone stopped talking to anyone other than their groupmates. Just kidding. But it was certainly true that it was time to work. There were two timeslots for optional concurrent sessions, and I attended the ones on economic issues and population issues (grimy statistics) which were really helpful for my knowledge and for the case. The PSC scholars had dinner together with the perm sec with other PSC scholars from outside this challenge, so everyone had a chance to take a break from the case, although people in some other groups were still typing at their laptops the whole time. That's when one of the mentors was chatting to us about life and we were discussing getting married early (which btw is what I would like to do, but reality is another thing). When the scholars came back, we continued working on our presentation (left), although some other groups were done and went to Shake Shack just before midnight, so envious! (right: Shake Shack right opposite our hotel! So near yet so far.) We called our mentor at 3+ and he came down to see our presentation before we called it a night.

Presentation went smoothly the next morning (having someone familar in the room definitely helps haha) and at lunch everyone was in the mood to talk again. Then we watched the finals, which the winning team from each room took part in. I was really impressed by the quality of the presentations. Yes, there were always holes to poke in any public policy recommendation, but my thought was always, no way, this couldn't have been done in 20 hours, given that I have tried and seen how short 20 hours really is. The presentations were well prepared, educational and at times funny, and I really enjoyed myself. After that, it was a super hurried parting given that Chang Xing and Kylie had a flight to catch, and the programme ended with a tea reception.

I'm really thankful to my groupmates: Chang Xing for inviting me into his team (!) for me to be able to experience all the above, and for his insights into current affairs; Kylie for her leadership, focus and care; Jack for his enthusiasm, hard work and bringing his working experience into our presentation. Getting up to speed without us all knowing each other was tough but it turned out well in the end! The organisers, mentors and volunteers worked really hard and lost a lot of sleep before and during the challenge, and were knowledgeable, enthusiastic and effective in forging connections among participants (definitely more than I was as a World Leadership Conference volunteer haha). Although I lost a lot of sleep in the week before and (mainly) the week after the challenge, it was all well worth the exposure, thought stimulation, and company, comfort and conversation with my fellow S'poreans studying in the US.

In four weeks at this time, I'd be out of America—on my BA flight from Trudeau (Montreal) to Heathrow, to be exact. I wish I weren't looking forward to being out of America. There's actually nothing wrong with it—not with NYC, its Chinatown and all the goodness contained within, or even American food in general. Just that everything is wrong with food in school, and also with how the days and weeks can be repetitive and meaningless, and people are just glued to their watches, rushing all the time to complete their next reading/paper/problem set. I feel like someplace where people actually made time for each other and for the little things in life would be refreshing for a change, which is why I'm really looking forward to May. I can't believe that I've been looking forward to college all my army life only to be so disappointed. Now, don't get me wrong, I can quite honestly say that life is amazing for me, just that all the fun seems to happen off-campus. :(

Can't help but think that the 4.5 classes (which is actually more like 5 classes when you take into account how much work the lab course really is) has got something to do with the stress. I don't mind short bursts, even RJ-style (when it was in blocks of 9 weeks, taking away exam week), but continuous blasts just wear me out. But then again, 4.5 classes every semester for Master's programme huh. It's okay, no more .5 lab courses that should really worth 1 class, and some more I must think of my future students!!

Road trip to Pennsylvania was FANTASTIC!! So Hao Yang flew over from London and we met Sandra and Stacy at NYC, and drove to Philly and Hershey on Fri and Sat two weeks ago. We managed to have so much fun, as we do no matter whether it’s S’pore or Hong Kong or now, in Penn. This once again goes to show that it’s not the place or even the planning but the people—it’s how every meeting turns out to be a surprise, a fresh adventure. And that’s what I really miss about those pre-college times, when I could never predict how the following week(end) would be like. I think that’s what college really lacks, if you’re cooping yourself on campus all the time.

After having a delicious white pizza dinner on Thu night in NYC, we covered the usual touristy places in Philly on Fri afternoon—Pat’s, Liberty Bell, Reading Terminal (chocolate, ice cream, and chocolate ice cream!!!)—before we drove through UPenn and then to Holiday Inn, our hotel for the night. There was a posh and legit-looking casino just three minutes’ drive away from our hotel, and we tried to go in but our date-of-birth IDs weren’t on their list of accepted IDs, dang. So then we randomly came up the idea of going to Walmart, and drove down and ended up spending the following two hours there, Sandra and Stacy replenishing their supplies at reduced prices as compared to NYC, and I buying stuff like pillows and chair cushions for my room. Then we went back to our room and, being S’poreans, played Monopoly Deal until 2+.

I personally had reservations about dedicating the entire second day to Hershey and driving, but those turned out to be unfounded because the programme at Hershey Chocolate World was so engaging and fun that it was worth the four hours’ detour. There were many programmes but we had time and money for only three: a half-hour chocolate tasting session, a trolley tour of a simulated factory and a session to program the manufacture of our chocolate bar. It was a children’s place, obviously, but I think it appeals to our age group because we miss childhood. The place was a chance for us to be children again—every element immersing us in a world of colours and sounds made possible by design, technology and a tiny bit of airbrushing (the smiling plastic cows sing along as their udders were squeezed for milk, hmm). While factual accuracy could be improved, the programmes were certainly fun, whether measured in terms of novelty value or pictures/videos taken, heh.

The trip really drilled into me how America is built on the automobile. I used to complain about the terrible public transport around my school and how things are so inconvenient and restrictive. However, with a car, this road trip allowed me to experience how America is meant to be—a land of infinite possibilities. We were completely new to the area we were staying at, but at the same time we were completely at ease and mobile. On a whim we decided that we wanted to shop, and in five minutes we were at the nearest Walmart, thanks to the lovely GPS and Google Maps. Freedom and mobility doesn’t get better than that.

I really like the trip also because I really felt at home with the three of them like I’ve never had in a long time. It was the whole package—the food Sandra and Stacy brought along (everyone my age remembers from primary school haw flakes, SEAWEED, cheese crackers, prawn crackers), the language, the habits (M-Deal!), at one time the Mandopop music—all coming together to create the feelings of home. It’s really quite amazing how Sandra and I could have been strangers (friends of friends) before the trip yet share common pieces of our childhood—like a cureless addiction to seaweed strips—just because of our age and nationality. You can see how books such as Things that Make Us Singaporean have a valid premise. For a weekend I lived the life of a S’porean student studying in the UK (i.e., usually around Singaporeans). For a weekend I wished more than ever that I were really in their shoes.

People are right, it really does take a bit of time to get used to college, especially as an international. Life recently has been spent fitting too many things into a tiny plate of mine: 4.5 classes (and all that that brings), participating/volunteering for the Asian club events, research assistance, pushing small initiatives for my classes, hosting a prospective student, helping out with a business on the side, all on top of making new friends in an environment that I find does not favour that, and enhancing connections with friends from home (the most important! :D). The latest things I'm trying to fit in are: volunteer tutoring (waiting for my tutee to get back to me) and learning driving (I already passed the only theory test and hold the Mass. learner's permit), and I desperately need to restart my learning French, and I'm just really hoping that it all fits :\

Spring is here and SPRING IS AWESOME :D It's been around 25°C in the afternoons since Sunday, and schoolwide elation is epitomised by the girls sunbathing in bikinis on random spots of grass on campus (I heard from seniors the same thing happened last year too -.-) But even if you're not sunbathing, it's just nice to wear shorts and slippers and walk around without having to put on n layers of jackets. Suddenly the girls are going to class decked in dresses and everyone looks so pretty *_* I actually take a while to recognise people I know cos they look so different now! It's almost like after the first three months in J1 when all the girls suddenly looked different and more mature in their new uniforms.

The other thing that warm weather reminds me of is home. If I do go home it'll be in August and the cheapest return ticket is US$850 (S$1,100), which is less than 60% of my ticket home from NYC last Dec. There's no doubt that in Dec, I thoroughly enjoyed myself with every single friend and group of friends I met up with, and memories of those precious meetups are still fresh in my mind. But considering those three weeks as a whole I did feel a bit disoriented at times. I was actually going out with friends more frequently than in the months before college, but I felt more bored in Dec. I realised that what made the period of those few months before college the magic that it was, wasn't just the dinners or holidays or fun with friends, but also things like cashiering, tutoring, volunteering, learning piano, practising for/organising RACO concert—long-term involvements that I can't engage in with just a few weeks at home (even for volunteering, most meaningful volunteer projects involve some pre-training). Home isn't just a geographical location, but also involvement in the community in a broad sense.

The other thing is that home is costly to return to, more in terms of money than in terms of time (though 24 straight hours of travelling is no joke either). I've been thinking of whether there's a better way of spending $850. 8 weeks of shared rental car (plus fuel, among four people, under-25 rates)? All the places I could go to, the sights I could see with that money. I hate assigning monetary values to experiences. 游子之愁.

Ever since going to Hong Kong last August, I've been missing the eating with friends at a Chinese restaurant throughout my first semester at Brandeis, which I didn't get to do when I went back to S'pore because I was too busy indulging in hawker food with my friends lol. But anyway, I do really miss round-table eating Chinese-restaurant-style. So I'm really glad for the chance to eat with Zhou Yang, Adam, Becky, Ainie, Zi Jing, Christie, Yuan Duan, Iris and Michael this evening at Asian Garden Restaurant to celebrate Chinese New Year!

The evening really brought me back to the time when Japclass visited the awesome duck restaurant at Hong Kong. I remember we waited for really long back then to get seated as well, and so did we this time. But that time was different because we had so much time together that waiting wasn't a really big deal, but this time it was just precious time wasted standing around in less than comfortable conditions. I wish that we had called in earlier so that we could sit down and talk properly for a longer time.

But in any case I really had fun with them especially hearing Zhou Yang's quotable quotes and the amusing interaction that ensued, even as some people were new to others. Like I've enjoyed SEAC dinners a lot, but self-organised ones like these do feel more intimate and fulfilling. Also, as I've said before, the fact that most of us are Chinese and speak Chinese helps foster closeness as well. I'm grateful for Zhou Yang's enthusiasm in organising this dinner, and for the opportunity to co-organise it with him. Mid-last sem when I was really homesick I never thought I could be celebrating CNY with a reunion dinner home away from home, but it has happened, so this is a timely dose of inspiration and motivation for the intimidating task of continuing to finding my place in this college!

祝大家新年快乐！:)